


Before I Forget

by Lyson



Category: Death Note
Genre: Death References, Explicit Sexual Content, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mild Kink, Permanent Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-11-30
Updated: 2012-11-30
Packaged: 2017-11-19 22:29:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/578314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lyson/pseuds/Lyson
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He came back for Matt but he came back a changed man...he came back to ask Matt to die for him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Before I Forget

* * *

 

Matt was woken by a light slapping to his cheek, softly at first and then a little harder until it actually stung a bit and he jerked awake.

“Wha!” he raised his head up and he felt like he couldn’t get up, there was tension in his neck, so he dropped his head back into his pillow, taking a deep waking breath and groaning in irritation, he’d only just managed to fall asleep after hours of his usual insomnia had kept him up…now he’d been woken up.

He blinked a few times and his eyes hurt a bit, he tried to open them but found that something was keeping them slightly pressured closed. He frowned and took in another deep breath, still half asleep he tried to figure out what was going on.

Matt tried to move his arms and legs to sit up and that was when he noticed that he couldn’t and he felt a little bit of panic set in, his breathing increased slightly. The tension in his shoulders was because his arms were above him and he couldn’t bring his legs up because they were wide apart and restrained.

He didn’t have many enemies, being a loner and all, but he had hacked a few people’s computers and shut down a few small ‘big time’ operations that he thought might bring someone after him. At this time, he realized he was blindfolded as well and the room was eerily quiet. He wondered if he was still in his bed in his own flat, that’s where he’d fallen asleep.

He moved his fingers and felt the handcuffs, warm against his skin which meant they’d been there for some time, they were tight to his wrists, but shifting his fingers around, he was able to feel the familiar smoothness of his wood headboard, which meant he was still in his own bed.

It didn’t help him much but he felt a little less lost, he knew where everything was at least and he knew that he had a gun under the mattress on his side.

His socked feet were tied very tightly but yet not so much that he’d lost circulation because he was able to wiggle his toes. He kept his face neutral, what was visible of his face since the blindfold covered his eyes and part of his forehead, he didn’t want to appear panicked, even though he was.

He moved his head around a bit, trying to see under the blindfold and see if he could see anything but it was placed very cleverly to distort his sight and beside that, there was no light in the room because he didn’t see anything reflected against the material when he opened his eyes just barely.

He had been wondering if he was alone right then when he felt movement on the bed, a distinct shift. Matt froze, thinking of waiting for anything else to happen but deciding against waiting, lest it not be in his favor, he cracked a lopsided grin,

“Hey…uh, look whatever you want, we can talk about it right. We don’t need to do this whole…hostage type thing. It’s so fucking cliché’…” he offered pleasantly and sounded quite calm.

He heard a laugh, soft but not too distant in a bit of a deep tone, it was an amused chuckle.

Matt didn’t how to respond, so he smiled, just in case the guy laughing was looking at him.

“…you haven’t changed. I could be holding a shotgun to your nuts and you’d be making jokes…” the guy said quietly.

Matt frowned beneath the blindfold, this guy knew him? He didn’t sound familiar.

“…do I know you?” he decided to ask, still calm and almost casual.

Mello was leaning back on the bed, legs crossed off the edge and head tilted so he could see Matt’s blindfolded face, he smiled,

“…I’m hurt Matty, you don’t remember me.” Mello said watching for any recognition to dawn on Matt’s face instead of the awkward half smile he had right then.

Matt frowned deeper, ‘Matty?’ he thought, knowing only one person who’d ever called him that. **Ever**.

But could it be?

“…M-Mello?” his heart was beating faster as he felt himself hope above hope that it was Mello, his only real and very best friend who he had sworn to himself as a child he’d do anything for.

That small chuckle came again and then there was another shift,

“That’s right…” Mello leaned forward as he sat and took his sad blue eyes off Matt for a moment.

The sadness in his voice was well masked but he didn’t know if Matt could tell.

“Jesus Christ, Mello? Is it really you?” he was grinning now and then he frowned again, “…why am I tied up?” he was concerned, Mello was unpredictable. For a moment he wondered if this was some twisted scene out of a sad movie when the person you’d give your life for if the one to turn on you.

‘Too many violent movies…’ he thought distantly.

“Mello, take the blindfold off, what’s with all this?” he continued to ask questions and wriggle a bit.

“Nice little place you got here…how long you been on your own?” Mello asked and watched Matt as he stopped wriggling, Mello smiled fondly as he saw Matt make a face, he always made the strangest expressions.

“…uh…I think, for about a year. I left Wammy’s when I turned 17.” He answered the question, hoping to have the favor returned.

“Are you working class now? Paying taxes and all that?” Mello shifted again and got onto his knees on the bed, sitting back on his legs and facing Matt who was frowning and not smiling anymore, he obviously didn’t like being blindfolded.

“I think we can talk about this without all the bondage. I mean…I know you’ve always been a little sadist but come on…” Matt whined in a joking way and done something like a pout with his mouth.

Mello stared at him and then moved to kneel again, placing his hands either side of Matt’s upper torso, beneath his raised arms. He leaned down and caught Matt’s stuck out bottom lip between his teeth, nibbling it very briefly before letting it go and his blue eyes lowered and raised over Matt’s blindfolded face, eyebrows drawn together in his sadness.

Matt’s breath had hitched and he could feel Mello’s breath on his face, he could actually smell Mello’s cologne, he licked his lips a bit nervously since this was both new, frightening and very exciting for him,

“Mello…wha-”

“Remember…” Mello cut him off and Matt felt Mello’s knee come between his legs, “…when I was 15 and I told you I was leaving…hm?” he was actually asking as he stared down at Matt’s blindfolded face. Matt’s mouth was slightly open from his unasked question but he closed it and frowned at the question and then he thought back to that day long ago,

“Yeah…I d-do, what about it…?” he thought he had an idea, considering Mello’s most recent action.

Mello let out a deep breath, some of Matt’s red hair over the blindfold shifted and he leaned in again, kissing the corner of Matt’s mouth carefully, avoiding the damaged burned skin on his own left cheek. It wasn’t close to his lips but he didn’t want Matt to feel it…or to see it.

He felt Matt lean his head up a bit, trying to return the kiss, very subtly puckering his lips where he felt Mello’s and the blonde let their lips meet briefly and then pulled too far up for Matt to reach. Frustrated and confused, Matt settled his bead back into the pillow about to make another attempt at a question when Mello again cut him off.

“You remember that you wanted to cry…” Mello leaned his weight on his one arm, the hand rested beside Matt’s head, he let his fingers trace the blindfold and then his index finger trailed over Matt’s pointed noise and then over his lips, tickling the slightly dry lips and making Matt rake his teeth over it to ease the feeling. Mello smiled and then pressed that hand into the mattress as well to balance out his weight over Matt.

“You kissed me…Matty, do you remember when you grabbed me and kissed me. All awkward and wet…” Mello had started chuckling, “…wanting to cry…you wanted me to take you with me…” but Matt couldn’t see the pain in Mello’s eyes.

“…y-yeah…I remember…”  Matt said quietly, remembering his attempt to keep Mello, he’d had a crush on the blonde since before he could understand it and when he was 14 it developed into a full blown crush where Matt knew he liked Mello a lot.

Then Mello was leaving and Matt wanted to kiss him…he’d wanted to kiss Mello for a long time.

He hadn’t known how, but he’d thrown himself into it…he didn’t regret it.

“I’m sorry…” Mello’s voice cracked, “…I’m sorry I never kissed you back.” He apologized.

Mello had not kissed him back, he’d shoved Matt off and told him he hadn’t had time for all that, he had to avenge L, he had to beat Near. He’d wiped his mouth and ran off from the gates with his bag slung over his torso and hadn’t looked back. There had been more important things than Matt’s mumbling about needing him and please don’t leave.

“Mello, we were kids…it was a long time ago. Why…do you sound so upset…are you alright?” Matt wanted to see Mello, it had been 3 years, he deserved to see the blonde again.

Mello bit back tears as he stared at Matt, innocently asking if he was alright, innocently wanting to see him…Matt didn’t know about what Mello had been through, Matt didn’t know how he looked now. How ugly he was now.

The left side of his body, all the way down to his mid-thigh was scarred, a discolored pinkish, brown color compared to its previous fair unblemished tone. His blonde pin straight hair that he’d prided himself on as a child had been singed and burned so Mello had had to chop it into a very uneven, un cared for mess. He had rubble scars on his body from the explosion as well, small, but just as unsightly as far as he was concerned.

“Mello, I know something’s wrong, take this fucking blindfold off!” Matt was getting irritated.

Mello sniffed and Matt froze,

“Mels, are you…are you crying?” he suddenly sounded so worried it warmed Mello’s heart, “…Mello please! Take off the blindfold! Take **all** this shit off, let me talk to you…please…!”

Mello took a calming breath and Matt felt it on his face, then he sat up kneeling, one leg between Matt’s spread legs and one of Matt’s legs being straddled between his own. Mello tucked his uneven hair behind his ears,

“You remember how you called me a pretty boy once and I hit you in the face…?” he sounded a little more loud spoken now, some confidence in his voice, a little more like Mello usually spoke.

Matt let out an irritated breath and turned his head away slightly, jerking on the cuffs in agitation,

“This fucking game is annoying me…I don’t see you for 3 years and you pull this bullshit, this isn’t funny Mello!” Matt said louder now as well.

Mello rolled his eyes,

“Do you remember Matt?” he asked again and Mello dragged the zipper of his hoody down, it was noisy in the quiet and Matt’s head turned back from the side, looking more or less up at Mello’s general direction, he swallowed nervously,

“Yeah, I do.”

“Do you remember what I looked like…you liked me that way right?” he pulled the jacket off body and his arms and tossed it on the floor. Then he pulled his loose T shirt up over his head, revealing to no one except his own shamed awareness, the burns running over his side. They reached over parts of his sternum and beneath his left pectoral, dipping into his defined abs and even running below his shallow navel, smooth ugly deformed flesh.

Matt couldn’t see it and that was Mello’s only comfort.

“Yeah, I liked you then, I like you now…I’d like to be able to see you.” He continued to persist, unaware of Mello’s half naked body looming over him.

Matt heard nothing from Mello but he felt the weight and shadow come over him, Mello shifted again and Matt could tell his waist had been straddled by the weight change on the mattress.

Mello leaned into Matt, forearms flat either side of Matt’s head and he kissed the red head’s mouth fully, demanding entrance with the force of his teeth and mouth over the other’s.

Matt took a short shocked breath and opened his mouth, Mello’s tongue instantly slipping in and running along his own and then Mello pulled back and pressed in again, kissing Matt deeper, lingering longer and sucking on Matt’s tongue with his own. Matt was breathing heavily, tasting remnants of chocolate, sweet on Mello’s tongue…and it mixed with his own slight nicotine very pleasantly, bitter sweet.

He raised his head, pressing into the kiss, letting his own tongue move against Mello’s and taking some control, Mello smiled, he felt it against his mouth and then he bit Matt’s lip and pulled back, breathing over Matt’s flushed skin.

“Mello…please…take this shit off…” he pleaded.

Mello ignored him and let his hand drift down followed by his eyes, Matt was shirtless and he wore only his boxer shorts. Mello had been staring at Matt’s lean body for some time while Matt was asleep.

“You still sleep like the dead, you know…” he breathed against Matt’s neck as he moved down slowly over Matt’s body, biting his skin playfully. Matt was swallowing heavily and his lips were in a straight line which showed he was irritated with the situation, despite his growing arousal.

“I was here for at least an hour, tying you up and blindfolding you before I had to wake you up myself…” he placed wet kisses over Matt’s pale chest and bit on of his nipples a little rougher than was comfortable and Matt didn’t mind, he licked his lips and breath heavier.

“Why the fuck am I tied up?” he asked, trying to ask nicely so Mello would tell him.

Mello ignored him again and Matt held his breath when he felt Mello’s warm hands trace his boxer shorts waist band and then he heard a click, a distinctive noise he knew as a pocket knife flicking open.

His breath hitched when the material was grasped and a tearing sound echoed, then Matt felt the room’s cool air on his naked skin, on his bare and exposed erection.

“You’re kidding me…” he pressed his head back into the pillow and sighed angrily, “…you really couldn’t just untie me?”

There was more weight shifting and Matt raised his head again, aimlessly trying to see something or locate Mello’s exact position and then he felt Mello’s soft hand take a hold of his length and he turned an even brighter red color as the slender fingers wrapped around him.

‘God, I’d give anything to be able to enjoy this properly…’ he thought, letting out another breath and he jerked on the handcuffs again.

Mello ran his slender fingers over the hot, hard flesh feeling it pulse in his hand, he was between Matt’s naked legs. He tucked his hair behind his ear before he descended, taking Matt’s length into his mouth and hearing him hold his breath and let it out shakily a moment later.

Mello went slow and took Matt as deep as he could whilst Matt breathed very heavily and jerked the cuffs restricting his hands,

“Mello…aaaah, please…please just untie me…” he begged now as Mello’s hot mouth went up and down over his length so slowly, Mello was grazing his teeth and using his tongue making him crazy and Matt was desperate to touch him, desperate to taste him.

But Mello continued to ignore him, reaching down to his own jeans and opening the button and zipper with both hands while he continued bobbing slowly. He let Matt’s erection slip from his mouth when he sat up, so he could get his jeans off, shifting around Matt’s body to get his jeans and underwear off, he tossed it where he’d thrown his jacket, wherever that was.

“Mello, fucking listen to me! Stop! Please!” he breathed out and the movement ceased.

Mello was stationary now, staring at Matt and waiting for him to continue.

“Please…this isn’t fair, I want to touch you too. You can’t do this to me, I want to enjoy this, I want to enjoy you.” He breathed out and his head flopped into the pillow and he stared blindly in the direction of the ceiling.

There was a long silence and then Mello shifted and Matt felt his legs against his own, bare skin against bare skin, he assumed from all the noises of zips and shuffling that Mello was naked.

He so badly wanted to see Mello naked.

“If I untie your hands and feet…you have to keep the blindfold on…” Mello stated.

“But why!?”

“Because I said so! B-because…because I want you to…please Matty…just keep the blindfold on.” His tone went from aggressive to pleading and Matt heard the sadness again.

He sighed and shook his head slightly,

“Fine…fine, I’ll keep the blindfold on.” He agreed.

Mello waited a moment, deciding whether or not he believed Matt, but he knew Matt never went against his wishes in the past, he didn’t think Matt would now.

He turned around and started untying the thin ropes he’d rigged around the bed posts. When Matt’s first leg was free he pulled it up and flexed it, some relief coming over him at being able to move again, then his second leg and he did the same. When Mello moved again, Matt could feel Mello’s presence was above him again, over him.

“Swear to me…that you won’t take it off. I need you to keep it on, I need you to remember me the way I was…” he stared down at Matt and he saw a subtle nod. Mello leaned over to the bed side and he lifted the small handcuff key, unclicking the first handcuff and helping Matt’s hand out of the metal. He paused and watched Matt’s hand lower and he saw him wiggle his hand around for circulation but he made no move to take off the blindfold.

Mello unlocked the second handcuff and tossed the key somewhere leaving the handcuffs on the headboard, he watched Matt rub his wrists alternatively and there was a moment where Mello was sure he was gonna snatch the blindfold off, but when he didn’t make any sudden movements, Mello relaxed.

He shifted above Matt so their naked skin was contacting and he let Matt move his legs closed so they were between his own and he straddled the red head again.

Mello was silent and nervous, he used his hand to help Matt back to full hardness, stroking him lightly. Matt’s ran his hands over Mello’s thighs, eager to touch, but Mello used his left hand to cover Matt’s on his left thigh quickly before it went too far and he directed the hand over his flesh, inward to the soft skin of his inner thigh, away from the burn.

Matt let his hands feel and explore Mello’s thighs, it turned him on so much he was almost shaking with need and with Mello’s light stroking it was even more intense. He left his hands drift, navigating easily between Mello’s legs, he found the correct place, Mello’s arousal and he returned the favor, stroking Mello,

“…you have no idea how much I missed you. Thank you for coming back, thank you for giving this to me…” he breathed out and sat up quickly which made Mello’s nerves jump.

He used both hands when Matt shifted suddenly, one grabbing Matt’s right hand on his left side and intertwining their fingers so the hand couldn’t wander and he slipped his other arm over Matt’s shoulder, running his nails over Matt’s back and pulling him closer.

They found each other’s mouths again and kissed deeply, Mello let a little moan slip as he grinded lightly against Matt’s body, their arousal’s heated against one another between them.

Matt was sexually aggressive, Mello noted in his kisses and his left hand was rough as he ran it along Mello’s unburned side and then down to Mello’s backside, squeezing the cheek firmly and letting out a low sound into Mello’s mouth.

Matt flipped them and so Mello was underneath close to the edge of the bed, still kissing and tasting each other like it might be the last. Matt pulled out of the kiss and he and Mello continued to rub against one another,

“Mello…can I take off the blindfold…I-”

“No…n-no…” Mello lost his breath for a moment, “…you promised…you swore. Just… picture me in your head.” He clutched Matt tightly to him.

Matt kissed him again and their bodies fell into place as Mello wrapped his legs around Matt’s naked waist. Matt slowly entered Mello, with some effort, pushing himself inside the intense hot, narrow passage without any real lubrication, he felt some resistance but heard Mello’s breath of pleasure and a quiet moan, he heard Mello breath his name between their mouths.

He jerked himself fully in and felt Mello’s nails dig into his lower back with another short moan, he didn’t hesitate and started moving, thrusting forcefully inward and outward. He felt Mello’s body jerking beneath him every time he thrust in, harder each time.

Mello’s moans and short shouts of pleasure telling him he was doing it right, he leaned on his forearms either side of Mello and firm thighs clutch his waist tighter.

Matt went all out, as hard as he could with all of his stamina and energy, he thrust into Mello and a certain moan let him know he’d found Mello’s sensitive nerves. He was breathing heavily, his own body reeling with pleasure every time he moved inside Mello, he could feel Mello’s hands tracing his back and his breath on his neck and face. The breathless whisper of his name made him say Mello’s a bit louder. He could feel he was close and by the sounds Mello was making, very vocally, he knew Mello was close too.

“Aaah…Matt!” he shouted out loudly when Matt struck his prostate again directly and Matt moaned loudly as his body became hot with sexual tension, he thrust directly against Mello’s nerves again and he felt every inner muscle of Mello tighten around his length.

He brought his right hand up, grabbing Mello’s thigh to raise it and get deeper…and then his hand slid along the large scar, to Matt it felt un-textured and too smooth uneven skin but Mello’s hand slapped over his quickly, clutching Matt’s hand firmly to his thigh so he didn’t move it any more. He ceased thrusting and all he could hear was their heavy breathing.

So close.

Matt let out a confused breath, his eyebrows drawing together,

“Mello…what is-”

“Just ignore it…” Mello lifted Matt’s hand and slipped his fingers into Matt’s palm, bringing Matt’s fingers to his mouth and sucking them slightly, playfully, “…don’t stop please…” he said huskily, with every intention of enjoying this without Matt seeing him first and ruining it.

“But-”

“Please Matt…” Mello moved his hips so Matt could feel him again and Matt’s breath hitched.

“Please…” Mello said more desperately and letting go of Matt’s hand, with both his hands free he slipped them into Matt’s hair, trailing over the knot of the blindfold so he was sure it wasn’t going to open, as he brought the red head downward to kiss him.

Matt was frowning beneath the blindfold, scared and concerned, all of his feelings for Mello he’d ever trod to forget had run through his veins so fluently the moment Mello initiated the touches but now he knew Mello was definitely hiding something from him and knowing this made all of his concern for Mello come to the surface.

But with Mello’s persistence and pleading for him not to question, he started moving again, slow at first, kissing Mello deeply, staying away from caressing his body no matter how badly he wanted to, keeping his arms either side of Mello’s head as he moved. He noticed how Mello kept his hands in his hair, moving Matt’s kisses to the right side of his face and neck. Mello was moving with him, he breathed in Matt’s ear for Matt to go faster…harder…

Matt started to lose himself in the sensation of being inside Mello quickly, the pleasurable friction, the taste of Mello’s skin and mouth, his moans filling Matt’s senses. He moved harder and faster and Mello’s pleasure was audible as they moved roughly together.

Matt let out a low moan when he felt Mello contract around him, he knew Mello had orgasmed, he felt Mello’s thighs tighten around his waist and felt him shudder. Matt followed very shortly after, kissing Mello’s sweaty forehead and leaving his lips pressed there as he rode out his orgasm.

Less than a minute of silence and breathing passed and Matt lifted himself up above Mello, moving off of him and sitting beside him on the bed. He left the blindfold on, sitting and trying to catch his breath completely.

“I’m so happy you came back…” he breathed quietly, the room seemed silent again and his voice notably desperate and worried.

He felt a shift.

Mello sat up too and stared at Matt through his disarrayed damp blonde hair, his body still slightly flush, Matt was sitting hunched forward, head dipped, blindfold still on.

“…I came…back to- fetch you.” Mello didn’t sound happy between his breathy words.

Matt’s natural instinct told him there was no good reason behind this.

“What’s going on?” he tilted his head in Mello’s general direction.

Mello wondered if Matt had decided not to take the blindfold off because he’d felt the scar and didn’t want to see Mello disfigured, but he knew better, Matt was just obeying. He always had obeyed so well.

“…it’s Kira…he’s winning.” He told Matt seriously, tucking some of his uneven damp hair behind his ear and looking down at the sheets between his naked legs.

Matt nodded slightly, understanding that he was needed, understanding that an extra person was required, another anonymous person to help out…a decoy.

He knew he would do anything for Mello from the time he had been ten. Nothing had changed. The only difference now was that the things Mello needed were no longer small things. They were life or death. Do or die. Win…or lose.

“You know I’ll do anything for you…”

“…would you…die for me Matt?” Mello’s voice carried very quietly.

Both knew it was a possibility in this situation, it was Kira after all.

Matt turned and reached his hand out, but before he could touch anything, Mello’s hand found his and Mello leaned forward so they could kiss, slightly desperate.

Matt pulled back a bit,

“…yes Mello…” he answered.

Mello said nothing.

Matt raised his hand to his face and he pulled the blindfold down off his eyes, so his green eyes met Mello’s empty blue…

 

 

 


End file.
